Film Review: Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009)

Review by: Chris Ward
Directed by: Declan O'brien Written by: Connor James Delaney (ScreenPlay) and Alan B. McElroy (Characters)
Released: October 2009

Bucking the trend of DTV franchises, 2007’s ‘Wrong Turn 2: Dead End’ was an exciting thrill-ride that outstripped its not-sure-if-its-serious-or-a-comedy predecessor. More mutants, more gore, characters that you routed for and Henry Rollins in an inspired bit of casting. You would think, then, that now a style for these movies has been established and it works, then part three would be an even bigger, bolder and better gorefest. As if they’d dare cock it up now...
After the now traditional opening gambit, where an insignificant group of eye candy youngsters get wasted (which is, to be honest, the best scene in the movie), we shift to the local prison where a group of high-risk prisoners are about to get transferred, and try breaking for freedom on the way. Stopping en route at the local sheriff’s office, the group then move on but their bus gets spotted by Three Fingers, the mutant cannibal, who rams them off the road. And so begins a desperate race for survival, as the prisoners battle not only Three Fingers, but also each other in a desperate bid to escape capture.

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Film Review: Infestation (2009)

Review by: Chris Ward

Directed and Written by: Kyle Rankin

‘Infestation’ is one of those gems that pops up every once in a while to show how great old-fashioned monster movies really are. Taking it’s cue from other mutant creature features like ‘Tremors’, ‘Eight Legged Freaks’ and ‘Slugs’, ‘Infestation’ stars Chris Marquette as Cooper, a wise-cracking slacker who has taken his employers loyalty to the limit and is about to get fired. But just as his boss is about to issue his cards, a strange sonic screech starts up and everybody in the building seems to pass out.

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Film Review: The Devils Rejects (2005)

Review by: Chris Ward
Written and Directed by: Rob Zombie
Released: July,2005

Ploughing a different furrow from his 2003 cult hit ‘House of 1000 Corpses’ – a movie that was basically ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ with added weirdness – Rob Zombie has revised his characters and held back on the spooky undertones for this more depraved sequel.

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An Overview of Friday The Thirteenth Films.

Review By: Chris Ward

Being the age that I am (early thirties, if you must know), it's quite hard to remember a time before there were any 'Friday the 13th' movies, as they have been such an integral part of my movie viewing life. Back in the good ol' early eighties there was always a 'Friday...' video leering at me from the shelf of my local movie nirvana (in this case, Videographic in East Grinstead - no longer there but I managed to buy most of their stock when they closed down!), but as I was only a wee pup, I was only allowed to watch Hammer movies and the odd Freddy Krueger film (?); I think my mother went on the theory that as long as there were no weapons or graphic pictures on the box then it was okay - I could watch '...Elm Street 2' as it only had a drawing of Freddy and a school bus on the cover, but anything with a bloody machete on it was out.

Anyway, it was always the title that intrigued me and one day I managed to (with a bit of convincing the guy behind the counter that my mum would be okay with it as she'd let me watch '...Elm Street 2'!) get my hands on 'Friday the 13th Part 3' and that was it, I was hooked. From then on, it was my mission to seek out all the 'Friday...' films (bear in mind they were still making them regularly then), which I did, and I have been a massive fan of Jason and his Camp Crystal Lake world ever since, so here's one fan's critical eye giving an opinion over what is arguably the best slasher series.

Directed by Sean S.Cunningham (Last House on the Left), 1980's 'Friday the 13th' ushered in the new decade continuing the theme of holiday-based slashers set by 'Black Xmas' and 'Halloween' during the previous decade. The story involves a summer camp called Camp Crystal Lake, that has been closed for many years, reopening it's doors. A group of young camp counsellors looking for the camp are warned by the local village weirdo to keep away, but, of course, they choose to ignore his warnings about the 'death curse' and other townsfolks stories about a young boy who drowned there back in the fifties, and the murders that took place soon after. After arriving at the camp, though, they soon find something is up as one by one, the counsellors start disappearing. All hope seems lost as only one survivor remains, but help soon arrives in the shape of Mrs. Voorhees, a friend of the camp's owners, who may not be quite as helpful as she first makes out...

This original 'Friday...' still ranks as the best of the lot. Taking it's cue from Carpenter's 'Halloween', but with added gore, this really is a suspenseful little shocker that, although suffering from a slightly weak script, still holds up today. Starring Betsy Palmer as Mrs.Voorhees, plus an appearance from a young Kevin Bacon, special make-up effects by the genial Tom Savini, and featuring an ending borrowed straight from Brian DePalma's 'Carrie', this may not be the most original movie of all time, but it is one of the most effective.

The inevitable sequel, imaginatively titled 'Friday the 13th Part 2', followed a year later and carried on the story quite smoothly. Cunningham was no longer involved but the film follows the style of the original nicely, due to a lot of the original crew being used. This time, the camp next door to Crystal Lake is opening up and a new group of counselors are gathering to get ready for the new season. Again, they are warned about previous events that have happened but they ignore it all - will they ever learn? Although the killer was apprehended at the end of the first movie (oh alright, it was Mrs. Voorhees killing the councellors in revenge for letting her son Jason drown in 1957) we are now introduced to Jason properly for the first time, as apparently he saw his mother being slaughtered and wasn't too happy about it, so he now lives in the woods and kills anybody who dares enter. Whoooooa!

All in all, this isn't a bad movie at all. There's a nice pacing to it so it never gets boring, and the counselors are all fairly likeable characters, although maybe a bit more one-dimensional than the ones in the first movie. Jason isn't in it a great deal, but when he does finally fully appear he fills the screen (literally), and the legendary hockey mask is still nowhere to be seen! A decent stab (!) at a sequel that doesn't quite hit the mark of the first movie, but still has enough style and suspense to carry it along.

And pretty much the same could be said for 1982's 'Friday the 13th Part 3', as again a lot of the same crew were involved. Supposedly carrying on where part two left off, Jason moves from Crystal Lake to the nearby Higgins Haven, where he terrorizes a new bunch of youngsters who are staying at the property. One of the group, Chris, was attacked in the nearby woods a couple of years earlier by Jason and has returned to try and confront her fears - which, of course, she does. Big time!

By now, plot was giving way to formula as far as these sorts of movies go, so to add an extra bit of excitement this movie was originally done in 3-D. And it must have worked because '...Part 3' was the most successful of all the 'Friday...' movies (apart from 'Freddy Vs. Jason' but that isn't a fully-fledged 'Friday...' movie). This is the one where Jason first puts on the hockey mask, and he was yet to have been butchered beyond belief so his movements were quite fast, instead of the lumbering zombie he was to become. There's no standout performances and the ending was a little contrived, but it's still a lot better than the other imitation movies that were starting to appear and it's by no means the worst of this series. But all in all, it seemed that the makers were out of ideas on the originality front, so...

'Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter' appeared in 1984, proving that maybe the best thing to do was end it before it became a joke - ha! Different director, different writers and a returning Tom Savini (who came back as he thought it would be 'the final chapter') but still the same old Jason, whose body has been taken to the local morgue. Unfortunately, he isn't dead, so up he gets and carries on slaughtering. He returns to his old stomping ground of Camp Crystal Lake, where he finds the two properties on the site, one occupied by a group of sex-mad, partying teens (shocker!) and the other by horror movie mad Tommy Jarvis (Corey Feldman), his mother and sister. Naturally Jason gets pretty mad and starts hacking them all up - until young Tommy finds a way to stop him in his tracks.

Even though the plot was wearing a bit thin, and a whole flurry of similarly themed movies were appearing left, right and center, this fourth installment is actually pretty good. It may lack the feel of the earlier movies in terms of it's look, but the pacing is frenetic, the acting not too bad for this sort of movie and, naturally, Savini's effects are superb and easily the best so far. Still not too sure what the final shot is supposed to be suggesting, but all in all a great slasher film. So that's it then...

Oh no, I nearly forgot - we then get to 'Friday the 13th: A New Beginning'; looks like Mr. Savini got it wrong! As did the makers of this movie. We begin with a now grown up Tommy Jarvis (John Shepherd) having a dream that Jason has risen from the grave and is out for revenge. We then learn that Tommy has been sent to live at a foster home for other disturbed young people in the middle of nowhere. Of course, it isn't long before bodies start piling up, but if Jason is dead, who is doing all the killing? Well, spoiler alert, it's...a paramedic, dressing up as Jason, whose son was murdered at the foster home by another patient who didn't want a candy bar! Durrh!

In an attempt to add a new twist to the bog-standard slasher formula, the makers decided that a 'whodunnit' was the way to go. Either this movie was ahead of it's time or it was just dumb - I'd opt for the latter. In all fairness, apart from the lame 'twist' and an awful performance from Shepherd as Tommy, there are some plus points to be had. The murders are still pretty good (love the guy getting his head strapped to a tree!), 'Tour of Duty' star Miguel A.Nunez puts in an amusing turn as a poor mans Michael Jackson called Demon, and there's more nudity than any other 'Friday...', so the key elements are there, but when the killer isn't Jason, and the connection to who it is is about as desperate as it gets, then it's time to look elsewhere for your slasher thrills. And again, the very last scene is a bit odd!

And it seems even odder when you see 'Friday the 13th Part 6: Jason Lives' as Tommy (Thom 'Return of the Living Dead' Mathews) returns to Jason's grave to make sure he's dead. He is, so he should have just left it, but, in a sort of homage to 'Frankenstein', Jason is brought back to life by a bolt of lightening, and it's up to Tommy to convince the local sheriff that the young kiddies at Camp Crystal Lake need protecting. Sounds easy, but you know it never is in these movies.

There are two ways to look at part six- it's either writing off part five and attempting to bring the series back to some sort of basic level, carrying on from part four and bringing Tommy's story full circle, or...you can shut your brain off, put the ending of part five down to the writers not having a clue and carry on watching regardless. Either way, this is probably the dullest of them all. There's nothing inventive, the plot is boring, Thom Mathews does what he does in '...Living Dead' but without the charisma and Jason gets killed (!) in a very dull way. All in all, and I'll use the word again, very dull. Well, tell a lie, there is a slight bit of amusement to be had in the James Bond-style opening credits, and C.J. Graham is probably the most intimidating Jason yet (now that he is officially a zombie!), but in the year that gave us the excellent 'A Nightmare on Elm Street 2' and 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2', Jason's latest offering was looking very pedestrian.

So maybe another twist was needed - or not! Now seemingly desperate for ideas to make 'Friday...' stick out from the pack, we were given 'Friday the 13th Part 7: The New Blood', where this time Jason was brought back from his watery grave by a girl with telekinetic powers (yes, I know!), who has come back to Crystal Lake as that was where she used her powers to accidentally kill her abusive father many years before. Under pressure from her sinister doctor to try and harness her powers, she gets in a rage and - you''ll never guess - manages to unwrap Jason from his chains, and with the other house on the lake occupied by those 'sex-mad, partying teens' (TM) so begins another killing spree.

Of course, it's complete drivel but, strangely, time does seem to have been kind to it (this used to be my worst one, but after revisiting it again recently it wasn't too bad). The pacing is reminiscent of part four, and the murders are pretty cool to watch, particularly the infamous 'sleeping bag smacked against a tree' death (side note: has anybody else noticed that when Jason swings the sleeping bag, it is the feet end that hits the tree but when he opens the bag it's the head that's split open? Still cool, though!). This movie was also the first of the series to feature Kane Hodder as Jason, who went on to play him in next three movies and has since become synonymous with the role. Ignore the crass 'Carrie' rip-off plot and just enjoy Jason killing people in inventive ways again.

Which brings us up to 1989 and the excellently titled 'Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan'. By now, horror movies had moved on slightly, with the surrealist 'Hellraiser' and the just utterly bizarre Frank Henenlotter moving to the forefront of the genre, so I guess the makers of the 'Friday...' series decided to go all-out hokey and see what happens - and what happened was still a pretty decent slasher. Receiving another electric shock, Jason reanimates once again but this time he manages to steal his victim's boat (stay with me...) and travels upstream where he finds his way aboard a ship full of graduation students on their way to New York. One of the students, Rennie (Jensen Daggett), was pushed into Crystal Lake when she was a child by her strict uncle Charles (Peter Mark Richman), who was trying in his own way to teach her to swim. She was held under the water by a young Jason, who was still living in the lake (!), so obviously the big J is after her now. Rennie, Charles and a few stragglers escape the doomed voyage and manage to get to New York, unaware that Jason has followed. So the Big Apple had better beware, as there's a new psychopath in town...

Any sense of realism or even just sensible ideas had long gone by now, but based on it's basic merits, '...Manhattan is a pretty good slasher. Again, Kane Hodder is a very menacing screen presence and the deaths are still great - I still love it when Jason punches off the head of one of the kids who has just tried to take him on in a boxing match - and there really is very little credibility to this movie, but it's still fun. In a moronic way. Which doesn't say much about me, really...

And that was it - until 1993! Although many regard '...Manhattan' as the last proper 'Friday the 13th' movie, somebody thought a proper ending was still needed so, moving from Paramount to New Line (home of the 'A Nightmare on Elm Street' franchise), 'Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday' came forth to give us the definitive Jason movie. And did it work? Well, not really. The origins of Jason's longevity are revealed to be down to a supernatural demon that can travel from body to body, creating killer zombies as it goes - which begs the question, why did it stay in Jason's rotten, thirty-five year old corpse rather than seek out fresh new bodies? Is it a throwback to the ideas presented in part five? Anyway, the movie begins with Jason being blown up by a SWAT team (even though he was left as a child at the end of part eight - oh dear, I've spoiled it again!) and his body is taken to the morgue; he must have his own parking space by now! During the autopsy, the coroner, for some unexplained reason, gets the urge to bite Jason's heart and - lo and behold - he is now possessed by Jason's supernatural conscience, and off he goes on a killing spree. Meanwhile, bounty hunter Creighton Duke (Steven Williams), who has been tracking Jason for years (allegedly, 'cos I don't remember seeing him in any of the other movies!), has discovered Jason's secret and knows the only way to destroy him - 'Through a Voorhees he was born, and through a Voorhees he can be destroyed' - and, as luck would have it, Jason's last remaining relatives live nearby. Bet you didn't know there were any left! So cue lots of macho fight scenes and special He-Man swords to kill Jason with.

As you can probably tell, I'm not really taking this one too seriously. Much like part eight, this is a movie you put on for shits and giggles when you get the lads round for a few beers. Unlike the other movies, though, there is a really nasty tone throughout and overall it's a bit of a mess. Steven Williams (a poor man's Carl Weathers) is a fairly lame 'hero' and there's very little sympathy for any of the characters. The scene with the coroner (played by 'Rocky V' actor Richard Gant) is just odd, and the 'Frankenstein'-style walking that all the Jason-possessed zombies do is just plain laughable. It's actually a bit of a relief when Jason (again played by Kane Hodder) appears at the end for the final showdown, and you'll probably give a little cheer - even though he's the baddie! And any urges to shout 'BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL' when the magic sword appears should be kept in check! The very final shot of Jason's mask being dragged into the earth by Freddy Krueger's gloved hand (do you see what they did there?) is a nice touch, and gives an indication of what's to come, but a solid entry in the long-running series this is not, despite original 'Friday...' director Sean S.Cunningham coming in as producer.

But fear not, because it wasn't over just yet. In 2001, as the new millennium dawned and horror movies were garnering mainstream acceptance again, thanks to Wes Craven's self-knowing 'Scream' series and the influence of Japanese cinema, New Line gave us 'Jason X'. Now normally, when a series of movies gets to the 'set in space' stage, it means that all credibility will be thrown out of the window...but luckily the 'Friday...' series threw it's credibility out of the window sometime in the mid-eighties, so hardcore fans were quite prepared for this sort of nonsense. The movie begins in 2008 where Jason has been kept prisoner in a military research facility, so that scientists can try to find out why Jason won't die (they obviously didn't watch 'Jason Goes to Hell'!). Rowan (Lexa Doig) is preparing Jason to be cryogenically frozen so he'll pose no further threat, but Dr. Wimmer (a great cameo by David Cronenberg) attempts to override her, thus causing the main man to escape confinement. After a scuffle, Jason and Rowan end up getting frozen until they get discovered by a team of science students - five hundred years in the future! By now Earth has become inhabitable, so aboard their spacecraft the young scientists thaw out their discoveries, unaware of the danger that Jason will do aboard the confines of a spaceship.

No doubt you'll know by now whether you're going to watch this or not. Is it any good? No, but if you switch your brain off it is quite enjoyable in a 'drink lots and see what's on' kind of way. Being set in space gives the makers a chance to invent some new ways to die - look out for the virtual reality Camp Crystal Lake scene where there's a nice nod to part seven - and this is purely the only reason to enjoy this movie. Jason even gets a futuristic makeover when his corpse gets reanimated by the ship's computers, although he still prefers his trusty twentieth century machete when it comes to the job in hand. The acting throughout is fairly terrible - only Cronenberg's brief appearance and the reliable Kane Hodder being engaging in any sense - and the effects are good but not mind-blowing, as they could have been given the setting, but at least it's a bit more fun than the previous entry and it never takes itself seriously. At all.

Is that the end of it all? Of course not, because in 2003 there was the inevitable 'Freddy vs. Jason' that was hinted at back in 1993, but as that isn't a proper 'Friday...' movie it shall be scrutinized elsewhere. There has also been the obvious remake/reboot/re-imagining (delete as appropriate) released this year, but, again, that shall be looked at on another occasion, as there's not enough room to put down everything that's wrong with it here.

And there it is. All the original stories of Mrs. Voorhees little boy looked at under a microscope and given to you to investigate and make up your own minds. All are readily available on dvd and, if you're feeling naughty, I can recommend inviting closing the curtains, locking the doors and giving yourselves a weekend to enjoy them all. Happy camping!

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Film Review: Embodiment of Evil (2008)

By: Chris Ward

For those who have been a follower of Josefel Zanatas, otherwise known as Coffin Joe, for the past forty-five years, the arrival of this movie - the third in a trilogy that began in 1964 with 'At Midnight I'll Take Your Soul' and continued with 1967's 'This Night I'll Possess Your Corpse' - will be nothing short of the second coming. To those who aren't up to speed on their Brazilian horror movies and have never heard of him, it may take a bit of selling.

In short, Coffin Joe (played by writer/director José Mojica Marins) is an undertaker whose wife was unable to bear him a son to carry on his bloodline. After killing her, he set about finding the perfect woman to have his child, which usually involved forcing himself upon women and doing very horrific things to them. In 'Embodiment...' we catch up with Coffin Joe as he is released from prison after forty years for his murderous crimes, where he meets up with his faithful assistant Bruno (Rui Resende) and a small gang of worshippers, and begins his quest for the perfect womb once again. On his trail, though, are the Military Police, and a vengeful priest, who will stop at nothing to put an end to Coffin Joe once and for all.

It all sounds straightforward when put on paper, but there really are a lot of subtexts going on in this movie, the most prominent being Coffin Joe's overly-Atheist insistence on being free from any sort of belief, a theme that pops up over and over again. There is also a lot of surrealist imagery - like the scene where Coffin Joe is inside the woman he has just had sex with and meets a character called The Mystifier, who shows him purgatory and death...sort of like 'A Christmas Carol' but a bit more twisted!

But in all the subliminal goings on, there is the gore - and plenty of it! We get to see a woman getting fed one of her own buttocks (!), one poor chap getting hung up by the flesh on his back, a woman getting hot cheese poured over her and a hungry rat let loose between her legs and various other stabbings and impalings. And surprisingly, in spite of the trashy feel to the movie, it's all done rather well and never looks false. There's also some cool flashback sequences to earlier events, starring a younger Coffin Joe lookalike, that add to the mayhem going on and never seem tacked on. Mix that with Coffin Joe's ability to fill the screen and totally command every scene he's in (and he's in most of them!) and the sheer scale of Marins' deranged inventiveness really comes through, already marking this movie out as a cult classic.

Overall, this is as trashy as movies get, but trashy in the good sense. It's one of those movies that would be great to watch in a packed cinema where ninety percent of the audience have no clue who Coffin Joe is or any sense of what's going on. Coffin Joe is a cultural icon in his native Brazil, and although his movies don't always make sense, they're always fun and based on that, 'Embodiment of Evil' is a winner.

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Examining The Hellraiser Sequels (Parts 4-8)

by: Chris Ward

     

   1987's 'Hellraiser' was a breath of fresh air for the horror genre. Confounding genre traditions and trappings, Clive Barker's vision of Hell as a domain where tortures are dished out by the Cenobites - 'demons to some, angels to others' and led by Pinhead (Doug Bradley) - and pleasure and pain blur into one was a stark contrast to the endless teenage stalk-and-slash movies that were dominating the market.'Hellbound: Hellraiser II' followed shortly after and bucked the trend of sequels by actually being pretty good. Less consistent than it's predecessor, it was nevertheless a decent stab at continuing the story and expanding on what had been established without compromising the original.

After some delays 'Hellraiser III: Hell On Earth' appeared in 1992, and this is where things started to change. Written by Peter Atkins and directed by Anthony Hickox, Barker's involvement was minimal, although he was consulted by Hickox behind the studio's back. When they saw what Barker had added they okayed it, but Pinhead was now a wisecracking, mass murderer in the same vein as Freddy Krueger. Exactly the opposite of what the appeal was in the first place.Now a watered-down villain for the MTV generation, Pinhead next appeared in 1996's 'Hellraiser: Bloodline'. An attempt to explain the origins of the puzzle box that summons Pinhead from his domain, '...Bloodline' is actually a bit of a mess. Initially directed by Kevin Yagher, the movie's producers wanted Pinhead to feature more. When Yagher refused to agree to the changes he disowned the movie. Joe Chapelle was then brought in to finish off and re-shoot some scenes, and then the movie had to be credited to Alan Smithee, a pseudonym used by filmmakers when a director has disowned his or her movie. To be honest, considering the troubled genesis of the movie, it isn't that bad.

It starts in the 22nd century (stay with me!) on board a space craft where a descendant of the original box maker is trying to close the gateway to Hell by the use of a new puzzle box. Telling his story to a soldier who has arrested him, we learn how the box was first made in the 18th century by a French toymaker called Lemarchand, who was commissioned by a noble aristocrat with an interest in the dark arts. The aristocrat creates a beautiful being called Angelique by sacrificing a peasant girl to the demon's in the box, who begins to wreak havoc by killing everyone she comes across. We then cut to the modern day, where the next unfortunate ancestor, John Merchant, doesn't just come face to face with Angelique but also Pinhead, who decides that more people should be killed. Then it's back to the 22nd century where Dr. Merchant must now close the gateway to Hell and banish Pinhead forever.

Due to the amount of edits and cuts, the movie is quite difficult to follow, and the acting is pretty poor. That said, the effects are good and it was certainly an improvement on part three, and it gave the story some sort of origin and closure. Usually when a franchise resorts to being set in space it means the ideas have run out, and had the series stopped there, any negatives could have been forgiven. But no; some bright spark at Dimension thought it would be a good idea to give the go ahead for a fifth installment.

Released in 2000, 'Hellraiser: Inferno' changed direction again and this time offered up a psychological thriller in the vein of a 1940's detective film noir. In fact, Pinhead doesn't come into it until the end, and when he does he serves no purpose other than to explain to the main character what has been happening. Briefly, the plot (or what there is of one) revolves around Joseph Thorne (Craig Sheffer), a corrupt detective who is investigating a series of murders apparently committed by somebody called The Engineer. Thorne discovers the Lament Configuration box and solves it, after which he starts seeing Cenobites. He captures The Engineer, who is a Cenobite, committing a murder on tape, but unfortunately nobody else can see it. During all this, Pinhead pops up and tells Thorne that he can still change his corrupt ways - a bit like Marley's ghost in 'A Christmas Carol'

Obviously this movie didn't start out as a 'Hellraiser' movie, and had it been left as a detective-learning-the-error-of-his-ways story it could have been okay. But shoving in Pinhead, some comedy lesbian cenobites (who seem strangely attractive?!!!) and the puzzle box doesn't make this credible in any way, shape or form. Clive Barker's influence is all but gone, Doug Bradley battles against rubbish make-up and a hammy script and comes across as desperate and, ironically, interest is lost when all the weird stuff starts happening. Overall, a half-decent detective thriller turns into a rubbish 'Hellraiser' movie and is best avoided.

But - and there is a but - even this movie seemed interesting next to the abomination that came next. 'Hellraiser: Hellseeker' came out in 2002 and wowed audiences with it's clever, twisting plot, state-of-the-art special effects and top-notch acting, earning the movie a place in many top ten charts around the world...okay, it didn't really. Directed by cinematographer Rick Bota, the obvious selling point of the movie was that Kirsty Cotton (Ashley Laurence), the heroine from parts one and two, was returning to do battle with Pinhead once again. Sounds good on paper, doesn't it? What really happens is Kirsty and her husband Trevor crash their car into a river. Trevor gets out but Kirsty is nowhere to be found. Seemingly indifferent to his wife's fate, Trevor starts to have visions and everyone around him starts dying. Eventually, he runs into Pinhead and told he's a naughty boy. Kirsty then appears and has a chat with Pinhead. They agree that Trevor's a naughty boy and then we flash back to the beginning where the two are in the car, and a different scenario unfolds.

There is one redeeming feature; due to Bota's previous experience, there is some nice photography and his use of lighting is good, but that's about it. Like the previous movie, you have to question why somebody thought inserting Pinhead in just so you can market it as a 'Hellraiser' picture was a good idea. And what's the obsession with dream sequences and flashbacks? By now, there's a familiar structure in place. We have a villainous main character who has visions of Cenobites and people dying, and several flashbacks later comes face to face with Pinhead and is told 'This is what you could have won!'. Complete drivel and the worst of the series.

'Hellraiser: Deader' appeared three years later, and although still awful, was a bit of an improvement due to it's story being an interesting concept. Reporter Amy Klein (Kari Wuhrer) is dispatched to Romania to investigate a cult who call themselves Deaders. Their leader, Winter (Paul Rhys) makes the wannabe disciples kill themselves and then brings them back to life through mouth to mouth contact. Amy gets her hands on the Lament Configuration box by taking it from the hands of the corpse of Marla and seems to get pulled into it, where she first sees Pinhead. After a series of events, Amy finds herself being influenced by Winter and in the position of being very close to death. The Cenobites then appear and kill Winter, but before they can claim Amy she kills herself.

It's an interesting concept, and in the hands of a more experienced genre director it could have been great. As it is, Rick Bota has once again given us a good-looking but ultimately bland movie that probably would have worked better as a short film. Again, it doesn't seem to have been a 'Hellraiser' movie from the very beginning and there are some ideas that could have been explored more - Winter alludes to the fact that he is part of Lemarchand's bloodline, but this is never followed up ---overall, a wasted opportunity to garner a bit more credibility to an ailing franchise. Although, once again this didn't stop the decision makers at Dimension

releasing another…Filmed back-to-back with '...Deader',

'Hellraiser: Hellworld' is a fairly contrived attempt to cash-in on the 'Scream'-style self-awareness of recent horror movies. A group of teenagers have been playing a 'Hellraiser' based game called Hellworld on the internet and have managed to solve an online version of the Lament Configuration box. In doing so they have won invites to a 'Hellraiser' themed party at a creepy mansion. The host of the party, played by cult favourite Lance Henriksen, informs them that the house they are in was a convent built by Lemarchand, and then proceeds to give them mobile phones to communicate with each other. As the party goes on, the group find themselves separated in different parts of the house and falling prey to Pinhead or the host. I shan't spoil the ever-so-clever twist (!) but needless to say, there are scene shifts, visions, etc. Oh stuff it, I will spoil it.

It all turns out it was all a drug-induced hallucination, provided by the host, as he is the father of one of the group's friends who died after getting addicted to Hellworld. For some reason, he thought that giving his son's friends drug, burying them in coffins and feeding them suggestions would be some sort of revenge. Anyway, Pinhead does his usual five minute appearance, there's some gratuitous nudity and the final scene when the host eventually meets Pinhead is classic 'Hellraiser'. Very much a teen horror movie, the original flair and intelligence of the first two movies was long gone, and although Lance Henriksen gives his usual intense performance, it's not enough to save this once-great franchise from disappearing up its own self-inflicted asshole.

With a remake of the original in the pipeline, with Clive Barker back on board (cue applause), 'Hellraiser' may rise once again to terrify audiences. Going back to Barker's original book - 'The Hellbound Heart' - there is plenty of scope to retell the original story in a different way, and there's the possibility to take it off in all sorts of directions. Unfortunately, vision often gets pushed aside in favour of dollars, and to do so in this case would be the ultimate betrayal of probably the most original idea in horror movies for the last twenty five years. So this goes out to whoever is in charge - for the sake of the fans, please don't muck it up this time.

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Film Review: The Mist (2007)

Directed by: Frank Darabont Written by: Frank Darabont (Screen Play) and Stephen King (Novel)

Review by: Chris Ward

I can remember a time when a movie that stated 'From Stephen King' would be greeted with anticipation and excitement. Unfortunately nowadays, this is rarely the case. When I was presented with this dvd to watch my first thought was ‘Oh well, if there's nothing else on TV, I'll give it a go’. This isn't to say that Stephen King stories are awful - because they're not - but, with only one or two exceptions, they don't translate to the screen all that well.
Anyway, a quick rundown of the plot --- A small town in America is overcome by a mysterious fog, out of which bug-like creatures appear and kill the locals. A small group of innocent shoppers are stranded in the local supermarket and have to overcome their fears, plus internal power struggles, to escape.

All sounds fine, if a little clichéd. To be honest, the movie started to drag in the middle. It starts well, establishing characters - the 'hero' David Drayton, his young son Billy, their neighbour Mr. Horton - and setting the scene for what follows. The three main characters all go to the local supermarket to get supplies after a storm has battered their properties. All well and good ---Then the movie starts borrowing from George Romero's 'Night of the Living Dead' and 'Dawn of the Dead'. People trapped in a shopping mall, unable to go outside, mysterious monsters lurking in the gloom, a power struggle between Drayton and Horton, another power struggle between Drayton and the local religious nut. Then we get the 'Return of the Living Dead' 'Army trying to develop new weapons...' plotline to explain how the monsters came to be.

It's only when we get to the end, when Horton and a few others escape, that the movie starts to pick up pace and offer some genuine tension. I won't reveal the ending but for those who aren't expecting it, it's a bit of a shocker and one of those genuine 'what would I do if that was me?' moments. Without blowing my own trumpet, I predicted the ending about ten minutes before it happened. After saying it out loud, I was promptly told by my co-watcher that 'That wouldn't happen', and lo and behold...

Overall, 'The Mist' is an average movie with a cracking ending, designed to really make you think. The acting is so-so, the script lame and inconsistent - William Sadler's character announces that he's not a religious man, and a couple of minutes later saying prayers and lambasting non-believers, and this is before he's under the spell of the local nutter - and the special effects not amazing. With obvious comparisons to the aforementioned zombie movies, plus other chillers like 'The Fog', it's hardly what you would call original either.
On the plus side, for those who aren't too familiar with other genre movies and those who don't analyze movies too carefully, it's an okay way to kill two hours. And that ending will get you...

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Film Review: Pathology (2008)

Review by: By Chris Ward

Release Date: April 18th Limited Release

Director: Marc Schölermann

Writers (WGA): Mark Neveldine (written by) & Brian Taylor (written by)

'Pathology' is an interesting little thriller. On the one hand it tries (and fails) to deliver a sense of morality to its preceding, a la 'Saw', but it just doesn't have that movie's depth or characters that you really care about. On the other hand, it does kill (!) 90 minutes and deliver a satisfactory ending.

The plot (or lack of) centres around brilliant graduate student Ted Grey (Milo Ventimiglia), a beacon of respectability and high moral values, who joins a team of fellow pathologists that have God-like egos. The main protagonist, Jake (Michael Weston), dares Ted to join 'The Game' - where the person being dared has to kill at random and the rest of the team have to use their skills to show how the deed was done. Will the seemingly incorruptible Ted take up the challenge of getting one over on his fellow interns?

All sounds good, but the main problem with this movie is that it all seems to happen very quickly. On day one, Ted starts his new job. By the end of day two, he's smoking crack, getting drunk out of his mind and is getting it on with Jake's girl. The sense of a morally sound man losing his decency and spiraling out of control is lost and therefore it's hard to sympathize with the character of Ted. That is until his fiance shows up, in the shape of butter-wouldn't-melt junior lawyer Gwen. It is only then that we see Ted start to really struggle with his conscience.
The performances are solid. Milo Ventimiglia comes across as a strong leading actor, whilst Michael Watson gives a flamboyant yet unnerving performance as the detestable Jake.

The autopsy scenes are gratuitously graphic and realistic (although I'm sure that during the second-to-last autopsy, the length of the body keeps changing as the camera moves around it - oh well) as are the very quick sex scenes. It is a shame that there was a real lack of character development and the fact that the movie relies on a high level of viewer expectancy - we are supposed to accept that there is a chamber below the hospital that nobody ever visits, yet the entrance is right next to the loading bay, and silly things like that - as there was a real potential for an edgy 'Saw'-esque thriller.

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Authors/Guest Writers.

SHOWCASE YOUR AMAZING LOVE FOR TALENTED AUTHORS BY SUPPORTING THEIR WORK. HERE ARE SOME OF THE CONTRIBUTORS OF THE HORROR PRESS.

SWEETREVIEWER: is a Freelance Writer/Paralegal with a passion for law,writing and anything horror. She started the www.thehorrorpress.com Horror Blog with the intention of promoting and showcasing amazing, talented authors that deserve recognition. She has contributed at The Horror Press with Movie Reviews and Horror News. Here are some sites that she currently writes for the following sites www.thehorrorpress.blogspot.com sweetreviewer.wordpress.com
Has written for AssociatedContent/Yahoo Contributors Network and http://www.wherescool.com/users/sweetreviewer/

Her buisness webpage is mvrlegal.com

RICK ROMANOWSKI: is a Horror Movie reviewer and aficionado based out of Chicago. His first encounter of his love for horror took place when he saw “The Thing” and “The Blob (1988)” he was so frightened that he started watching Goosebumps. He then graduated to The X-Files and soon after to hardcore horror flicks. Rick loves writing reviews and critiquing horror flicks. Rick wants to become a filmmaker and an editor. He loves rock and roll ranging from the 1950 to now. He has been an avid fan of collecting movie soundtracks mainly horror, which he analyzes. He is what you would call a collector of anything horror and calls himself a " huge geek when it comes to movies in general." Rick contributes Horror Movie reviews for www.thehorrorpress.blogspot.com and has a regular blog at http://www.paradiseofhorror.blogspot.com

CS DEWILDT: Has contributed to The Horror Press with a Short Story called Masterpieces.
He has been writing stories for a long time and just recently felt they were getting good enough to submit for publication. Amongst the multitude of rejection letters a few people have been good enough to publish his work. Though he writes about anything and everything, horror has always had a special place in his heart as he grew up on Commander USA's Groovy Movies, The Twilight Zone, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, and Stephen King novels. His dream is to just keep living and writing.
He Has A Story called COULROPHOBIA CATHARSIS Published in http://www.staticmovement.com/dwildt.htm He will have a story published in Bartleby Snopes later this month and has had another accepted by Ruthless Peoples Magazine for publication sometime in the next couple months. Contact: csdewildt@yahoo.com myspace.com/csdewildt

CHRIS WARD:  Chris Ward is a lifelong fan of movies, particularly horror/exploitation and action, and metal.  His love affair with the dark side began at a very young age when his father put on a video of 'An American Werewolf in London' to act as a substitute babysitter.  Since then, his tastes have broadened. Chris is a fan of everything from the Universal monster movies of the thirties through to the current crop of extreme European cinema, with particular favorites being the Romero zombie movies, 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre', the so-called 'video nasties' of the eighties, 'Hellraiser', 'The Hills Have Eyes', 'Re-Animator', 'The Evil Dead' and 'Martyrs'.  He is also a massive Stallone fan and cites 'Rocky' as his favorite movie of all time, as well as being a fan of eighties/early nineties action movies, such as 'AWOL', 'Red Scorpion', 'Predator' and 'Action Jackson'.Currently unemployed, Chris has used his time to start writing about the movies and music he loves, and says his ambition is 'just to be paid for doing the things I like'
Chris has contributed movie reviews for www.thehorrorpress.blogspot.com and has a regular blog at www.chriswardcockney01.blogspot.com

Michael Shawn Milazzo: has gone by Shawn since his first day of life. Shawn’s first love of horror ascended from the works of Ray Harryhausen’s special effects in Clash of the Titans and Jason and the Argonauts, that he claims he recalls viewing at the age of 3. Shawn Milazzo attended a Catholic private school from preschool to 6^th grade. When he could understand the difference between Good and Evil, He became completely fascinated with evil entertainment. At the age of 14 Shawn Milazzo worked on a website owned by Troma Entertainment The creators of the Toxic Avenger, Trey Parker and Matt Stones Cannibal the Musical as a contributing writer and film critic but due to budget cuts the site was shut down when he was 17. During Shawn’s teens he was in multiple Death Metal bands as the vocalist and was in honors English at his High School.Now at the age of 25, Michael Shawn Milazzo currently attends college in San Francisco California and is focusing on getting his degree for a bachelor’s in motion picture & television. He works as a Freelance writer and is writing numerous Scripts for Film and novels that haven’t been published or sold yet.

Shawn would like to thank EC Comics Tales from the Crypt, Haunt of Fear, Crime Suspense Stories H.P. Lovecraft, Rod Serling’s Twilight Zone and the Million B-movies that have influenced him since the years.Shawn Milazzo can be contacted either through email or on many of these great websites; unfortunately he hasn’t been able to make an official website yet but is working very hard to be able to afford one.

Shawn Contributed to http://www.thehorrorpress.blogspot.com with a short story 'Host' Contact:http://shawnmilazzo.deviantart.com/ 

http://www.myspace.com/shawnmilazzo

DANIEL GUTIERREZ: is a 26-year-old Las Vegan who is just getting into independent films as a director and screenwriter. Aside from film-making,He loves to write short horror stories and novellas. Ever since he was little, he has always been fascinated with the supernatural and the unexplained, like stories from H.P. Lovecraft to Stephen King to film classics such as The Exorcist and The Twilight Zone series. He is hoping to revive the horror genre in both anthology and literature, and despite the busy time he has with film-making, He'll always make the time to write some more stories.
Daniel has contributed to The Horror Press with a short story titled "Sand Island."

DAVID PETTEYS: is a college student in New England, majoring in English Literature. Poetry happens to be one of his avocations, and some day, he hopes to publish novel-length works.
Ever since he was a kid, he was interested in the things that went bump in the night. Investigating the unknown, led to horror...a fun and curious fascination.
He contributed a poem for The Horror Press titled "Little Rag Doll."

Allen D. Reed was born in Fort Smith, Arkansas and raised primarily in East Texas. He spent his school years with his mother and stepfather in a staunch Christian home. During school breaks, he would stay with his biological father in Oklahoma and watch movies like Chopping Mall, House, and Hellraiser with a joyful greed. While at home with his mother, Allen fostered his interest in Horror through art and reading. His love of all things dark, unusual, and downright scary remained with him into adulthood and fused his love of the written word. Allen D. Reed now lives and writes in Fort Worth, Texas. He Contributed the Short Story 'Good Morning Margaret' for THP.

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